Sunday, June 29, 2008
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Traffic Jammer
Driving back north toward Lahaina, traffic slowed to a crawl. We were tired after our long hike, but okay, good-naturedly snapping pictures and listening to our favorite island radio station. (We developed a favorite early on; it has a certain parody quality like the radio in Grand Theft Auto Vice City.) Then the radio announcer said something like, "If you're driving along the road south of Lahaina and are wondering why traffic is so jammed up, it's because there's a guy--or girl?!--in a bikini out on the rocks playing drums, and people are slowing down to look at it. If you're down there and you are interested, just pull over! Don't slow down the traffic." No sooner did we hear that, then we actually saw the phenomenon she was referring to! It made the island feel like quite a small place. Below is a detail photo.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Wedding Eve (1 day)
There have been many things to write about these past weeks, but at this time more than any other, I have been too busy living to think about recording. It has been a very vivid time, especially the past few days: staying in a hotel long enough almost to call it home, having all together these different sets of relatives and friends, being faced with crises and adventures and things that need to be arranged, trying to see everyone all at once. Imagine, today I saw a high school friend I haven't seen face to face for some twelve or thirteen years! And family members I haven't seen for years either... as well as members of my new family whom I had never met. Having my mom near has been somehow quite indispensable psychologically. Even if it's just little things, knowing that I can run over to her room or call her on her cell somehow makes all the difference. The same is of course true about my dad, whose presence is comforting and supporting in quite another way, but maybe it's a deep strange feature of impending marriage that I want very much to run to her and be soothed.
Actually today was quite a relaxing day. We had the rehearsal yesterday, and that was very stressful, very heavy somehow. I can see why people have them, but it was a difficult thing to do. Maybe some of the nervousness will be dissipated. I have heard that when the bride gets married she is often very absent and numb during the actual ceremony, but I didn't feel that way during the rehearsal. I was totally and almost excruciatingly there! We are going to say our vows holding hands. Mom commented that we are glad we are holding on to each other (or holding each other up!). I think we were both a little overwhelmed by even the dry run. Today, though, we went on a long hike with a large group of friends and had dinner at a pub afterwards. There was a lot of jollity, different friends leaving and arriving, a very kicking back mellow kind of night. Pocket of Bolts and I got along quite well considering...! Possibly I was a bit peevish but at least not a total basket case.
I told Pocket of Bolts that the wedding experience is partly for me the process of learning how to be not a princess but a queen. I feel that, a gradual increasing feeling of dignity and gravity. It is not a role that comes naturally, one I am having to grow into, but I think I am succeeding in doing so. Except at odd moments. It is grand to have supportive family and good friends around me, people I care about and whose presence is simply pleasing. One thing that really pleases me best is the guest list, the people who ended up being here. It is marvelous that they are here, every last one.
Well, I must go to my parents' room, as we are spending the night apart. It seems silly, but at the same time one of those traditions that we'll only have this one chance to experience. I presume it is intended to prevent us from having some stress-related fight...! In any case, I am slipping out of the room now, while Pocket of Bolts is down the hall having a last round (or many) with the jolly company of our friends. When next I write I suppose I will be someone new, but then I am already starting to feel like someone new.
Actually today was quite a relaxing day. We had the rehearsal yesterday, and that was very stressful, very heavy somehow. I can see why people have them, but it was a difficult thing to do. Maybe some of the nervousness will be dissipated. I have heard that when the bride gets married she is often very absent and numb during the actual ceremony, but I didn't feel that way during the rehearsal. I was totally and almost excruciatingly there! We are going to say our vows holding hands. Mom commented that we are glad we are holding on to each other (or holding each other up!). I think we were both a little overwhelmed by even the dry run. Today, though, we went on a long hike with a large group of friends and had dinner at a pub afterwards. There was a lot of jollity, different friends leaving and arriving, a very kicking back mellow kind of night. Pocket of Bolts and I got along quite well considering...! Possibly I was a bit peevish but at least not a total basket case.
I told Pocket of Bolts that the wedding experience is partly for me the process of learning how to be not a princess but a queen. I feel that, a gradual increasing feeling of dignity and gravity. It is not a role that comes naturally, one I am having to grow into, but I think I am succeeding in doing so. Except at odd moments. It is grand to have supportive family and good friends around me, people I care about and whose presence is simply pleasing. One thing that really pleases me best is the guest list, the people who ended up being here. It is marvelous that they are here, every last one.
Well, I must go to my parents' room, as we are spending the night apart. It seems silly, but at the same time one of those traditions that we'll only have this one chance to experience. I presume it is intended to prevent us from having some stress-related fight...! In any case, I am slipping out of the room now, while Pocket of Bolts is down the hall having a last round (or many) with the jolly company of our friends. When next I write I suppose I will be someone new, but then I am already starting to feel like someone new.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Picnic by the Lake (11 days)
Today we went for a picnic by the lake. We ate watermelon slices, feta, olives, hummus, and pitas. Also we had a water-bottle full of "grape juice." Here is a picture of the handsome guy I am marrying. I think he looks quite dashing!It's been a quiet day. I spent all morning at home doing items from my to-do list, mostly wedding-related. Small last details. Most of them are not as stressful as those big decisions. Just things that have to get done.
One thing I did do was type up the vows. Using a template of course, but with a few touches of my own. It was strangely moving, even just going over them carefully. I got all teary. Pocket of Bolts got teary too when he read over them. Same with my mom. Maybe we're getting all the teariness out of the way now so we can say these things in proper clear voices during the actual occasion!
Pocket of Bolts went in to school for a lunch meeting, so I was on my own for lunch. I managed to make an amazingly tasty one:
1/2 cup (dry) whole wheat penne, cooked
1 original boca burger, heated on a pan with cooking spray until browned, then chopped into small pieces
1 t olive oil heated in a pan with a pinch of salt and a pinch of pepper
1 c kale, sauteed in oil
1/4 of a red onion, chopped and thrown in with the kale, also the boca
1/2 c very ordinary plain spaghetti sauce, poured over the sauteed mixture with 1/2 c water and heated thoroughly
Sauce poured over pasta, so elegant and tasty, a perfect 6 point lunch (i.e., around 300-350 calories).
My Chinese friend called me just as I was about to leave the house. She's in Germany now, soon to start a PhD program. She was very curious about and interested in the wedding. I talked to her for some time. My Chinese is imperfect, but still good enough to get through a conversation. I really should work on it more.
Spent all afternoon shopping but unproductively. The lastest fashions don't suit me very well, and I'm just kind of waiting around for them to change. Pocket of Bolts found some interesting groomsman gifts, so that was something!
Then evening, our dinner picnic by the lake. This is Pocket of Bolts striking a pose, like Monsieur Crevelle in Balzac's Cousin Bette. Me looking oddly pliable. Lately I have a million and a half freckles, despite diligent application of 50 spf sunblock. It's just hard to stay out of the sun, especially on gorgeous days like this.I suppose it's time to turn in. Pocket of Bolts is already sound asleep. I have been up answering e-mails from the last few people on the guest-list. I sent them little reminder e-mails and am fascinated by the types of responses they send, all very quickly, several with a story. How complicated lives are; each circle of like a machine with so many moving parts, and they move in impossibly complex ways, caught up in the gears of other circles which in turn are turned by other gears. I sometimes think it's amazing that anyone comes together or stays in contact at all.
Monday, June 09, 2008
Quick Pic
Here's me giving the talk at grad school grad conference. It's a LOUSY-ass picture, but anyway here's the sole record of me doing something that most of you have never seen me doing. (Choose one or more:) Giving a talk. Wearing a blazer. :)
Friday, June 06, 2008
My Old Burrow (15 days)
I am posting, just briefly, from my old burrow in grad school library. It's strange to be here. I came for a grad conference, but tacked on an extra day in case I wanted to meet with people or take care of loose ends--just a way of making the trip more relaxed and productive. Now I'm a bit homesick and I miss Pocket of Bolts, but overall it was a really good choice. I've found a ton of interesting stuff in the well-stocked library, got a lot of electronic goodies from one of my younger classmates, and reconnected with one of my old grad school buddies that I had drifted out of touch with. It's a nice feeling.
The first time I came back here after being in China, I felt incredibly disconnected and ill-at-ease. But maybe because this time I'm here for a conference or maybe because I have finally started to get to know all the younglings, I have felt a little more comfortable.
Last night I stayed with one of my bridesmaids and her significant other. They live in the same housing complex PoB and I used to live in, and it's one of those where all the units are either identical or mirror. My friend's unit is identical, and also we gave them our old dining room table when we left. So being in their place is extremely nostalgic, a whole complicated set of memories from more than two years ago, when the relationship between PoB was much younger than it is now!
I didn't sleep very well (too much caffeine I think), worrying pointlessly about things that turned out to be small and trivial when I woke up and actually thought about them. Around 6:30 this morning I went out for a run. I ran the old loop that we used to do when we lived here. I remember it being so hard! But my body is such a machine now. I finished the loop, even did an extra curlicue, and was still ready for more. So I ran down to the nearby canal, a much longer run. Everything was so interesting, though, that I barely felt it. Honeysuckle is in bloom here right now, and there's a lot of humidity in the air, making the smell of it very heavy and thick. It's not hot, however. It is very late-spring, everything lush and green.
Well, I must go catch my plane now. Every time I come here I vow that I should really spend more time here, that I would get a lot more work done if I did. But then when I'm in Chicago and contemplating leaving there, I feel that it's all a dreadful mistake. It's strange belonging (and not belonging) in two different places.
The first time I came back here after being in China, I felt incredibly disconnected and ill-at-ease. But maybe because this time I'm here for a conference or maybe because I have finally started to get to know all the younglings, I have felt a little more comfortable.
Last night I stayed with one of my bridesmaids and her significant other. They live in the same housing complex PoB and I used to live in, and it's one of those where all the units are either identical or mirror. My friend's unit is identical, and also we gave them our old dining room table when we left. So being in their place is extremely nostalgic, a whole complicated set of memories from more than two years ago, when the relationship between PoB was much younger than it is now!
I didn't sleep very well (too much caffeine I think), worrying pointlessly about things that turned out to be small and trivial when I woke up and actually thought about them. Around 6:30 this morning I went out for a run. I ran the old loop that we used to do when we lived here. I remember it being so hard! But my body is such a machine now. I finished the loop, even did an extra curlicue, and was still ready for more. So I ran down to the nearby canal, a much longer run. Everything was so interesting, though, that I barely felt it. Honeysuckle is in bloom here right now, and there's a lot of humidity in the air, making the smell of it very heavy and thick. It's not hot, however. It is very late-spring, everything lush and green.
Well, I must go catch my plane now. Every time I come here I vow that I should really spend more time here, that I would get a lot more work done if I did. But then when I'm in Chicago and contemplating leaving there, I feel that it's all a dreadful mistake. It's strange belonging (and not belonging) in two different places.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Research (23 days)
Last night for some reason I slept unusually well and heavily. It was hard to wake up, but when I did I felt so well-rested.
I spent almost the whole day at U of C. It was interesting because the trip, which often has taken me 2 hours, took just under an hour this morning (from 10 AM-11 AM). It was oddly speedy!
Most of the day I spent in the library researching things. My folder of articles and book chapters is bulging and looks like it's about to burst.
In the late afternoon I went to hear a talk about medieval Buddhist concepts of bugs in the body.
It took longer to get home because of rush hour, traffic backed up on Lake Shore Drive. As usual after a day at U of C, I was so tired. Pocket of Bolts had a nice dinner made for me when I got home (around 7:30), Mediterranean chicken a la crockpot. It was comforting and tasty.
Meant to do work this evening but didn't. But tomorrow is another day.
I spent almost the whole day at U of C. It was interesting because the trip, which often has taken me 2 hours, took just under an hour this morning (from 10 AM-11 AM). It was oddly speedy!
Most of the day I spent in the library researching things. My folder of articles and book chapters is bulging and looks like it's about to burst.
In the late afternoon I went to hear a talk about medieval Buddhist concepts of bugs in the body.
It took longer to get home because of rush hour, traffic backed up on Lake Shore Drive. As usual after a day at U of C, I was so tired. Pocket of Bolts had a nice dinner made for me when I got home (around 7:30), Mediterranean chicken a la crockpot. It was comforting and tasty.
Meant to do work this evening but didn't. But tomorrow is another day.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Storms and Victory (24 days)
For the past few days there has been a storm. Hard winds rattled our windows and challenged the plants so that only the strong survived. Pocket of Bolts says that they were small pieces of tornado come here from Iowa. That may be. Today was sunny but cold, really cold, especially in our house. I have been doing pretty much nothing but writing and more writing, with tiny bits of wedding planning on the side. I have a conference presentation NEXT WEEK. It is horrifying. Tomorrow is going to be an extra big push.
Today we rode bikes down to the Division corridor to pick up our thank-you notes from Paper Doll. We also hung out in Letizia's Natural Bakery and worked for a lot of the afternoon. We split a raspberry cupcake. It was amazing.
This evening, because we had both been working ALL day, I kicked back a little. Pocket of Bolts worked on a project he has been thinking about for a very long time. Namely: when we got the Playstation, it was with the understanding that I would be able to play Vib-ribbon on it. Well, that turns out to be especially hard since Vib-ribbon is a PS1 game that was released only in Japan. It's a music-game where there are different jumps depending on the characteristics of the music; also you can use your own CDs, which is too cool. However, the modded PS2 we got wouldn't play it. I had kind of given up on it (I mean, we ascertained that it wouldn't work back in January), but Pocket of Bolts hadn't. Enter a lot of used and sketchy electronics, months of slow accumulation, and also Pocket of Bolts teaching himself how to solder. Also a lot of cursing. But the results... IT WORKED.
"What is clear," said I to Pocket of Bolts, "is that you are a man who keeps his promises." He said his chest was all filled with pride.
Today we rode bikes down to the Division corridor to pick up our thank-you notes from Paper Doll. We also hung out in Letizia's Natural Bakery and worked for a lot of the afternoon. We split a raspberry cupcake. It was amazing.
This evening, because we had both been working ALL day, I kicked back a little. Pocket of Bolts worked on a project he has been thinking about for a very long time. Namely: when we got the Playstation, it was with the understanding that I would be able to play Vib-ribbon on it. Well, that turns out to be especially hard since Vib-ribbon is a PS1 game that was released only in Japan. It's a music-game where there are different jumps depending on the characteristics of the music; also you can use your own CDs, which is too cool. However, the modded PS2 we got wouldn't play it. I had kind of given up on it (I mean, we ascertained that it wouldn't work back in January), but Pocket of Bolts hadn't. Enter a lot of used and sketchy electronics, months of slow accumulation, and also Pocket of Bolts teaching himself how to solder. Also a lot of cursing. But the results... IT WORKED.
"What is clear," said I to Pocket of Bolts, "is that you are a man who keeps his promises." He said his chest was all filled with pride.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Home Again (27 Days)
It was hard getting up at 6 this morning to go to the airport.
Then, instead of getting work done as I had planned, I impulse-bought a novel at the airport bookstore. Then I proceeded to read it the entire flight, finishing it about half an hour before landing. I guess I was fiction-starved.
It took a long time to get back from Midway with all the luggage, because I took elevators instead of lugging things down stairs (at least 3 different times). When I did get back, I was desperately impatient for Pocket of Bolts to get back too. He was coming from O'Hare and his flight got in later, so I beat him by about half an hour. I watered our deck plants, which were droopingly thirst, and did a few other little chores.
I was sitting down with my computer when I heard his step on the stairs. I was so happy to see him!
But then also so low and weary. As usual it was wonderful seeing my family but overall the trip was exhausting and took a lot out of me. In fact, no work at all got done today. Pocket of Bolts and I relaxed, and just had some grocery-store roast chicken and rice for dinner. We agreed not to try to approach wedding stuff (all the little last minute tasks) until tomorrow. We went for an after-dinner walk to the lake, and asked him about his trip.
Summer seems to have properly come to Chicago. It has gotten ten degrees warmer and thirty percent more humid, says Pocket of Bolts. I think it is comfortable.
Now I am up late. Pocket of Bolts has been asleep over an hour, but of course I'm going the party direction and he's going the other way. Tomorrow I am going to try to a) deal with the rest of the remaining wedding stuff, b) get back into gear with my work, which I REALLY need to do since I'm going to have to give a talk and meet with my adviser in less than two weeks (panic attack here).
Jury is still out about whether I'm going to go to the Memorial Day party to which we have invited. I think PoB is going with or without me but... everything seems so important right now, every last detail of what I do--momentous for the future. It's terrifying of course and sends me straight into escapism. Parties are not escapism for me but something I do when I'm feeling good and strong and relaxed. If I'm not feeling like that, it's work...
But tomorrow: tomorrow I'm going to do everything right.
Then, instead of getting work done as I had planned, I impulse-bought a novel at the airport bookstore. Then I proceeded to read it the entire flight, finishing it about half an hour before landing. I guess I was fiction-starved.
It took a long time to get back from Midway with all the luggage, because I took elevators instead of lugging things down stairs (at least 3 different times). When I did get back, I was desperately impatient for Pocket of Bolts to get back too. He was coming from O'Hare and his flight got in later, so I beat him by about half an hour. I watered our deck plants, which were droopingly thirst, and did a few other little chores.
I was sitting down with my computer when I heard his step on the stairs. I was so happy to see him!
But then also so low and weary. As usual it was wonderful seeing my family but overall the trip was exhausting and took a lot out of me. In fact, no work at all got done today. Pocket of Bolts and I relaxed, and just had some grocery-store roast chicken and rice for dinner. We agreed not to try to approach wedding stuff (all the little last minute tasks) until tomorrow. We went for an after-dinner walk to the lake, and asked him about his trip.
Summer seems to have properly come to Chicago. It has gotten ten degrees warmer and thirty percent more humid, says Pocket of Bolts. I think it is comfortable.
Now I am up late. Pocket of Bolts has been asleep over an hour, but of course I'm going the party direction and he's going the other way. Tomorrow I am going to try to a) deal with the rest of the remaining wedding stuff, b) get back into gear with my work, which I REALLY need to do since I'm going to have to give a talk and meet with my adviser in less than two weeks (panic attack here).
Jury is still out about whether I'm going to go to the Memorial Day party to which we have invited. I think PoB is going with or without me but... everything seems so important right now, every last detail of what I do--momentous for the future. It's terrifying of course and sends me straight into escapism. Parties are not escapism for me but something I do when I'm feeling good and strong and relaxed. If I'm not feeling like that, it's work...
But tomorrow: tomorrow I'm going to do everything right.
28 Days
It is 24 days until I will stop being "Zapaper", as it were, and become "Mrs. Pocket of Bolts." I am winding up my fourth and last wedding planning trip to the city where the event is going to take place--I fly out early tomorrow so I decided on a hotel near the airport. It's strange being alone after spending so much time with family. When my dad dropped me off here and started on the two hour drive back to where he lives, I felt momentarily at a loss, almost the way I did when my family dropped me off in Boston where I went to college and suddenly after a boisterous three week road-trip with our elbows in constantly in each other's faces... I was alone facing my freshman year, the first time living outside the nest. Of course there's really nothing so momentous about this particular separation. I'll be back in less than a month, only a few weeks! But somehow I feel like I will be different when next I'm here.
I'd just met with the photographer, the last of the nine appointments I had during my few days here, and the last vendor who needed to be contracted with. I was pretty wound up from the nervousness of having to make important decisions and from having had so much coffee.
I called Pocket of Bolts first. He's on a wholly different plane from me this weekend, having a sort of early bachelor on the opposite coast. We are in different modes and moods and time zones but very much in agreement that we miss each other and want very much to be back together again.
The hotel has a swimming pool and a hot tub, but I didn't bring a swimming suit. I did, however, have a navy blue tank top with shelf-bra and some black underwear. Close enough! I had a nice long soak in the spa, and then a shower. Then I took some of my scholarly reading down to the restaurant, and quietly read and ate a decent "Mandarin Chicken Salad." Who knows why I also had to go for the apple pie as well, but somehow I was helpless before the power of temptation. After I ate that, I was deeply deeply full, so I went for a long walk.
I reserved this hotel on Orbitz this morning, the only real criteria being "free airport shuttle" and "free wireless", though for some reason "clean" and "not run down" turn out to feel important too. This one's actually kind of a winner in that regard. It's right next to a golf course, which might displease some but I didn't have a problem with it. I took a really long walk, just along the road, to help burn off the extra calories. The road seemed to go through the golf course (rather, to cut it in half). As a result, there were a lot of rabbits, who clearly are happy to inhabit those big grassy spaces. The rabbits were cute and not very shy.
The light was beautiful, one of those gorgeous falls of light where there are dark intense grey clouds overhead but the sun has fallen so low that the slanting light shines sideways and lights up the trees and the grass, making the grey clouds almost seem to glow and touching everything else with gold. Things smelled nice. Gradually I separated out the smells and identified some of the nicest ones as flowers. So I picked a wildflower bouquet as I went along, clovers and wildrose and some great-smelling white tree flower and flowering grass heads (I'm not allergic) and some nightshade sort of thing and queen anne's lace. The thing is actually pretty nice looking, arranged in a plastic cup on my desk... I took a few cell phone pictures and thought about myself as a bride.
After that, I meant to do some work but instead I got started watching unfamiliar TV channels. Typically I don't watch much TV, but on a whim I did. I watched about 15 minutes of Titanic (running around in the flooding ship action scenes, actually quite a low point in the film) and maybe half an hour of 300, which I had actually never seen before (lots of Persians getting skewered--but wait, that's probably the whole movie, isn't it). It struck me as very Lord of the Rings inspired, what with all the Asian monstrosities.
Meanwhile a tremendous lightning storm brewed up and started rumbling and flashing. After a while the satellite kicked out and there was no more TV. That was pretty salutary because it inspired me to get on my workout clothes and go down to the fitness room. This place gets good marks for its fitness room--there's bottled water and the machines actually work. The elliptical (my machine of choice) was about a foot a way from a mirror, so I noticed the way my body looked. I was surprised how satisfactory it looked.
Now I am back from a hard half-hour workout and drooping with tiredness. I'm going to leave my entire room a disaster area until tomorrow morning. Why not?
I'd just met with the photographer, the last of the nine appointments I had during my few days here, and the last vendor who needed to be contracted with. I was pretty wound up from the nervousness of having to make important decisions and from having had so much coffee.
I called Pocket of Bolts first. He's on a wholly different plane from me this weekend, having a sort of early bachelor on the opposite coast. We are in different modes and moods and time zones but very much in agreement that we miss each other and want very much to be back together again.
The hotel has a swimming pool and a hot tub, but I didn't bring a swimming suit. I did, however, have a navy blue tank top with shelf-bra and some black underwear. Close enough! I had a nice long soak in the spa, and then a shower. Then I took some of my scholarly reading down to the restaurant, and quietly read and ate a decent "Mandarin Chicken Salad." Who knows why I also had to go for the apple pie as well, but somehow I was helpless before the power of temptation. After I ate that, I was deeply deeply full, so I went for a long walk.
I reserved this hotel on Orbitz this morning, the only real criteria being "free airport shuttle" and "free wireless", though for some reason "clean" and "not run down" turn out to feel important too. This one's actually kind of a winner in that regard. It's right next to a golf course, which might displease some but I didn't have a problem with it. I took a really long walk, just along the road, to help burn off the extra calories. The road seemed to go through the golf course (rather, to cut it in half). As a result, there were a lot of rabbits, who clearly are happy to inhabit those big grassy spaces. The rabbits were cute and not very shy.
The light was beautiful, one of those gorgeous falls of light where there are dark intense grey clouds overhead but the sun has fallen so low that the slanting light shines sideways and lights up the trees and the grass, making the grey clouds almost seem to glow and touching everything else with gold. Things smelled nice. Gradually I separated out the smells and identified some of the nicest ones as flowers. So I picked a wildflower bouquet as I went along, clovers and wildrose and some great-smelling white tree flower and flowering grass heads (I'm not allergic) and some nightshade sort of thing and queen anne's lace. The thing is actually pretty nice looking, arranged in a plastic cup on my desk... I took a few cell phone pictures and thought about myself as a bride.
After that, I meant to do some work but instead I got started watching unfamiliar TV channels. Typically I don't watch much TV, but on a whim I did. I watched about 15 minutes of Titanic (running around in the flooding ship action scenes, actually quite a low point in the film) and maybe half an hour of 300, which I had actually never seen before (lots of Persians getting skewered--but wait, that's probably the whole movie, isn't it). It struck me as very Lord of the Rings inspired, what with all the Asian monstrosities.
Meanwhile a tremendous lightning storm brewed up and started rumbling and flashing. After a while the satellite kicked out and there was no more TV. That was pretty salutary because it inspired me to get on my workout clothes and go down to the fitness room. This place gets good marks for its fitness room--there's bottled water and the machines actually work. The elliptical (my machine of choice) was about a foot a way from a mirror, so I noticed the way my body looked. I was surprised how satisfactory it looked.
Now I am back from a hard half-hour workout and drooping with tiredness. I'm going to leave my entire room a disaster area until tomorrow morning. Why not?
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Gambling Break
The past week has been great. No classes, no major external stresses, just a lot of work to be done, and a lot of it actually getting done. Pocket of Bolts and I have played some fierce games of racquetball, and spent a lot of hours in various coffee-shops with out computers back to back (in way that must look icky to everyone else, but it works so well for us...), getting shit written.
Two nights ago, after a long day of scholarship, we went out to play poker again. I'm not sure if I mentioned our last poker game. Some grad students and very junior faculty in PoB's department get a game together about once a month, Texas Hold'em, $20 buy-in. Now I was raised by a Quaker, and really shouldn't enjoy gambling. I was really hesitant to even try it the first time. While I was in China it was one of those things that PoB did which I was mildly disapproving of and worried about but held my peace. Then one of the nights, significant others were expressly invited and PoB talked me into going. Of course, $20 is REAL MONEY to me, not just small change, and given that I had never played before, I was pretty sure I'd lose it all. So PoB staked me, arguing (like they all do) that you'd spend that much hanging out with friends at a bar. Well, I don't do that either. But anyway, I went along with it, learned the basics of the game, showed up and did my best.
It turned out to be a blast.
Of course that first time I lost the entire $20, but it took me most of the night. This is a real achievement, because if you run out of money too early, the temptation to "buy back in" is horrible, and then you probably end up losing another $20 (but sometimes you end up winning it all back...). And they all say, well, it's still within the realm of what you'd spend hanging out a bar with your friends. This is not true of me in any imaginable scenario. Unless I were drinking top-shelf and really slowly, $40 would get me too drunk to walk home. But anyway, to make a long story short I had a really fun time.
So two days ago we went again and I used my own $20. I played very conservatively, and not only didn't lose my stake but actually came out up by $1! Maybe next time if I'm lucky I'll make enough to buy myself a whole cup of coffee, ha ha. But don't worry, I won't get hooked. I'm too miserly ever to win big, because I can't bear to bet big, even on a nearly sure thing. And I find bluffing nearly impossible. (Or so I will let everyone continue to think.....) It wasn't hard to walk away, even when I was only up by $1, as all I could think of was, "Wow, I even still have some money left!"
Mostly, though, it was a really fun time. I like the company, and social situations are always easier for me when there is some formal activity going on, with the talking taking place around the edges.
Two nights ago, after a long day of scholarship, we went out to play poker again. I'm not sure if I mentioned our last poker game. Some grad students and very junior faculty in PoB's department get a game together about once a month, Texas Hold'em, $20 buy-in. Now I was raised by a Quaker, and really shouldn't enjoy gambling. I was really hesitant to even try it the first time. While I was in China it was one of those things that PoB did which I was mildly disapproving of and worried about but held my peace. Then one of the nights, significant others were expressly invited and PoB talked me into going. Of course, $20 is REAL MONEY to me, not just small change, and given that I had never played before, I was pretty sure I'd lose it all. So PoB staked me, arguing (like they all do) that you'd spend that much hanging out with friends at a bar. Well, I don't do that either. But anyway, I went along with it, learned the basics of the game, showed up and did my best.
It turned out to be a blast.
Of course that first time I lost the entire $20, but it took me most of the night. This is a real achievement, because if you run out of money too early, the temptation to "buy back in" is horrible, and then you probably end up losing another $20 (but sometimes you end up winning it all back...). And they all say, well, it's still within the realm of what you'd spend hanging out a bar with your friends. This is not true of me in any imaginable scenario. Unless I were drinking top-shelf and really slowly, $40 would get me too drunk to walk home. But anyway, to make a long story short I had a really fun time.
So two days ago we went again and I used my own $20. I played very conservatively, and not only didn't lose my stake but actually came out up by $1! Maybe next time if I'm lucky I'll make enough to buy myself a whole cup of coffee, ha ha. But don't worry, I won't get hooked. I'm too miserly ever to win big, because I can't bear to bet big, even on a nearly sure thing. And I find bluffing nearly impossible. (Or so I will let everyone continue to think.....) It wasn't hard to walk away, even when I was only up by $1, as all I could think of was, "Wow, I even still have some money left!"
Mostly, though, it was a really fun time. I like the company, and social situations are always easier for me when there is some formal activity going on, with the talking taking place around the edges.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
New Bikes
We got new bikes. Pocket of Bolts didn't have one at all since his last one was stolen, and I was due for an upgrade.
The thing about me and bikes is I just don't find normal road bikes or even mountain bikes very comfortable. I only feel comfortable when I get to sit up straight. So for a pretty reasonable price I got a specimen of the much reviled cruiser tribe. It's not very fast, but it's really comfortable.
Our helmets, sitting side by side on the radiator. Don't worry, the radiator's not on.
Pocket of Bolts riding his bike down our alley toward me. We gave up our bus passes and have been trying to bike nearly everywhere. It doesn't always work out but we bike often enough to make it worth not having a monthly pass. If we can do it until the weather gets cold again next fall, the savings in CTA fares ought to pay for the bikes, a nice thought.
Today we biked to school (35 minutes) and beat not one, not two, but THREE buses. It was most triumphant.
The thing about me and bikes is I just don't find normal road bikes or even mountain bikes very comfortable. I only feel comfortable when I get to sit up straight. So for a pretty reasonable price I got a specimen of the much reviled cruiser tribe. It's not very fast, but it's really comfortable.
Our helmets, sitting side by side on the radiator. Don't worry, the radiator's not on.
Pocket of Bolts riding his bike down our alley toward me. We gave up our bus passes and have been trying to bike nearly everywhere. It doesn't always work out but we bike often enough to make it worth not having a monthly pass. If we can do it until the weather gets cold again next fall, the savings in CTA fares ought to pay for the bikes, a nice thought.
Today we biked to school (35 minutes) and beat not one, not two, but THREE buses. It was most triumphant.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Teaching Send-off
Last weekend, Pocket of Bolts and I went to Chinatown to have Saturday morning dim sum with my students. Mind you, this wasn't something I had organized or even suggested. It was all them. Okay, that was pretty cute. Only about a third of the class came, but it was still really touching. I include a funny picture of us all standing under the gate. Chinatown here certainly is a small world. While there we ran into two others of my students who were otherwise occupied and so unable to attend the dim sum. The dim sum itself was fun. The food was average, the company very amusing. College kids are so...young. But it was fun to see them unbend more from the relatively formal classroom selves.
After eating (way too much for both Pocket of Bolts and me, given our calorie-counting and despite our attempts at moderation) we got a tour of Chinatown from the students, most of whom are Cantonese speakers and much more familiar with the place than I am. Among other things, we saw a really hilarious pro-Olympics performance/rally sort of thing with inflatable versions of the "Five Friends." We also got taken into some awesome stores, including the dried fruit store and a Chinese bookstore which made me all nostalgic.At some point, they surprised me with an impromptu present they had gotten for me: a tea set with Chinese characters on it. I was quite touched despite myself and all the resentment I've felt over teaching duties. They also gave me a card they had all signed. They asked me if I could identify all their different hand-writings in Chinese. Pretty close! I have graded a ton of their homework over the course of the year! Here's a picture of the tea-set. It says: "Love never ends" on it, though I'm not sure if any of them were actually up to reading that kind of vocabulary. They're only first year students after all. Is this not pretty totally adorable?
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Flower Tree
Spring has finally come to the Windy City and trees are in bloom. I was particularly interested in this one, which has its flowers coming straight out of the trunk. Isn't that odd?
I am almost all done with teaching responsibilities, and can go back to being a real student. The last thing I have to do is finish grading the final and I've been putting it off quite assiduously. But a lot of other things have gotten done... Sadly, dissertation work isn't really one of those things...
Friday, May 09, 2008
Contact Lenses
As part of my strange, wedding-related self-refashioning, I got contact lenses for the first time in years. Contact lenses seemed to have changed some since I last had them way back when. They correct for astigmatism now, and the disinfecting process has gotten simpler. Oddly, there's quite a difference in the way things look. Pocket of Bolts laughs at me because I keep saying that everything looks bulbous, especially eyes and feet. What must actually be true is that my glasses distorted things slightly (due to the distance from my eyes to the lenses?) and made certain things look smaller? I don't know, but anyway, it's a real change. In this silly picture of me, you can just see the lens at the edge of one of my eyes.
Sunday, May 04, 2008
My Investment
When I was leaving Beijing last June, I got my security deposit back. I spent some of it getting to the airport and buying stuff there, but there was a good chunk of it still left. I decided to leave it in renminbi (Chinese currency) instead of changing it to dollars, since there was every indication that the dollar was getting weaker with respect to the RMB. If I had changed my 2200 RMB last June, I would have received roughly $282 US. If I changed it at today's rate of 6.98950 RMB per dollar, I would get $315 US. My gain of $33 may not sound like much, but consider that that's on an initial investment of only $282 dollars, meaning that my money grew nearly 12%--in slightly less than a year. Show me a CD that could do so well! I should have kept more RMB. Now the key is to get out at the right time...
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